I'm not trying to be a pessimist, I'm just trying to be prepared.
How seriously are you supposed to take these kinds of thoughts when you know you don't really want to die, but at the same time, the idea of continuing to exist as your horrible self fills you with dread and rage?
I take a LOT of naps.
I'm with you in the painfully liminal space of recovery.
Toxic shame, also known as internalized shame, is, frankly, a bitch.
It's okay if it takes some time to figure out what's going on in your brain. Maybe if I tell you these things, I'll believe them too.
Is it me, my illness, or the hormones?
It's hard to love someone you kinda secretly (or not so secretly) hate.
Over the last decade, I have struggled with depression, anxiety, executive dysfunction, suicidal ideation, extreme sensitivity, and a deep-seated sense of self-loathing, and if you think I survived all that on my own, you are deeply mistaken.
I outlined a few of my favorite distraction and self-soothing tools in my latest HealthyPlace article "How I Use Distress Tolerance Coping Skills When Everything Is Too Much."